No Such Thing as Sick Enough

     Reaching out and getting support is a big step in recovery. However, it can be hard deciding within ourselves if we “deserve” help or if we want to get better. What if we are not sick enough to be in recovery?
This is a cognitive distortion that is common with eating disorders. In other words, the beliefs that we need to be sick enough or look sick enough is a lie. Sometimes, our mind even lies to us to make us believe maybe we are faking it and that there is a way to just “snap” out of it. Other times, we may not even see our behavior as a problem to be addressed. People around us may even unintentionally enable our beliefs with compliments or criticism around our looks or habits.
The question “Am I sick enough?” is no valid gauge to determine whether we need help. The word “enough” suggests that there is a standard to be met. Comparison defines that standard. When comparison is taken out of the question it becomes, “Am I sick?” or “Do I need support right now?” We all deserve support whether we are on a mountaintop or our lowest valley. Sick in the dictionary is defined as, “affected by physical or mental illness.” If your life, beliefs, or behaviors are affected in any way then yes you are sick, but why does it have to be enough? There is no singular look for what an eating disorder can look like. Yes, you are sick enough, but your mind will never believe it if you are going by this logic.
Here are some signs it is time to get support:

1. You are a human being confined by any limitations that prevent you from experiencing the world fully.
2. If you ever asked yourself “Am I (or do I look) sick enough?

Of course there are others, and I encourage you to talk to someone or write down what else do you think is limiting you right now. Recovery is not easy. Relapses do happen, and if they do it does not mean you are starting over from square one. It means getting up, picking up your sword, and dusting off your armor. Your worth and capabilities did not change, and sometimes the battle plan just needs readjustment.  
-written by student intern